Why do we get jealous of others? Is Envy an inherent instinct? Does it trigger an innate emotion conducive to self-preservation? Is it similar to that shot of adrenalin that informs humans (and all animal species) of danger — initiating the ‘fight or flight’ instinct?

We are taught that being envious of others is petty, selfish behaviour. As a matter of fact, it is considered one of the seven deadly sins.

However, if we observe early childhood development, envy and selfishness appear to be a basic trait that occurs naturally, and often. Children have to be taught to share, to be considerate, to not want to be the center of attention at all times.

We know that a child’s universe is extremely self-centered. Specifically, because they are unaware that the rest of the world is out there. They know what they know, and need. And that is “everything” is all about them, what they want, when they want it, and right now. When we are children, there is no sense of time and space, or patience. It is instant gratification from the moment we arrive on the planet.

We can’t blame parents for making their child the center of their universe, because children can do nothing for themselves. Everything has to be done for them. Is that the beginning of proprietorship? When children learn that these people (parent caretakers) are their jurisdiction? “They take care of all my needs.”

Even before a child becomes aware of danger, they know their needs will be met by these people (parent caretakers) showering them with affection and protection.

Hence, when that attention is taken away, even momentarily, for say, another small being, it becomes a threat. Sibling Rivalry is universal. It generates feelings of envy, caused by fear that the all important “I” is being neglected and abandoned.

And, if I am abandoned, what will happen to me? Danger! Danger, Will Robinson! warns the programmed robot.

Therefore, envy is a product of fear, like most things that cause us trouble. Even when you connect it to the saying that, “Envy is the highest form of flatter.” It is a reflection of a “sense of self” not having something that someone else has, which reflects back to the abandonment issue.

If I don’t have that, I am not blah blah blah me me me, my my my, I I I…therefore, why does that person have …. and I don’t.

Then, like we do when we are children, we have a need to “take it” from them, to deprive them of this thing that should be ours, so that we will be safe, and happy, and well.

This emotional safeguard starts early. And it continues throughout childhood with our siblings, our friends, our neighbors, our co-workers, our mates, and the people we make our outright enemies. For instance, other countries that we war against.

It requires an enormous amount of grace, and humility, and compassion to overcome this seemingly innate emotional safeguard. The good news is that we are all capable of having all those “good” traits as well. The key is learning to cultivate them.

Unfortunately, the political, religious, and eductional institutions created to do just that, have not succeeded wholly. Instead, they have managed to cultivate seeds of division, which counters those “good” traits, and inflames the emotional safeguard of envy, perpetuating strife, unnecessary conflict, and societal chaos.

It’s one thing to have choices, i.e. a particular faith that suits your needs, etc. However, when we are programmed at the beginning of our lives to believe that our faith, our political preference, our school or team, our nation, our sexual persuasion, is not just a good way, but the best and only way, we have essentially generated societal polarization.

No civilization can survive strongly or lastingly under that strain. Community is threatened while community is under the guise of communing…sharing.

Once we understand that jealousy, envy, and even sibling rivalry are stepchildren of a fearful emotion for self-preservation, we can begin to engender those three most valuable human traits mentioned above: grace, humility, and compassion.

True, there are dangers in the world. Natural disasters, sickness and death, because they are the unknown factor. Human violence and devastation are products of societal flaws created from unnatural fear.

Fear itself, is a product of our imaginations. Envy, jealousy, and sibling rivalry become self-deprecating characteristics left over from our childhood.

Guess what? There are no monsters in the closet or under the bed. And if we’re still suffering from these vices, tendencies toward envy, jealously and sibling rivalry, it’s time to grow up. It’s that simple. But no one is saying it will be easy. Growing pains are never easy.

In the News again today, “Another Professional Athlete Busted for Cocaine!” No need to say a name, it doesn’t matter.

It’s not an epidemic. It’s a deception. Drug dealer’s target athletes for three reasons:

1) Money
Athletes are targeted early…in college…in high school. The more potential a player shows in those formative years, increases the money opportunities in the pros. Hence, if you can get them hooked before the money comes, you’ve got a “wealthy client” for the long term.

2) Exposure
High profile clients, candidates for idol worship, will improve the odds to lure in impressionable fans. Everytime a well-known athlete is exposed for drug possession, it glamorizes a way of life. It’s free advertisement.

3) Vulnerability
Most of these athletes are young men who have not come into their own. They do not have a sense of self-awareness and, like everyone else, have a need to belong, to be cool. They are told, “to be a man, you need to do this and handle that.”

So who gets targeted most and why?

First, compare African American Athletes to your White Athletes. How often do you hear of a Larry Byrd, or a Wayne Gretzsky, or a Dan Marino getting busted on crack? Now, let’s consider Strawberry, or any number of great Black ballplayers who have gone down that dark road.

Most of these young men did not have strong male role models in their life and it’s easy to fall for this deception. Most of these young men come from single parent, mostly mothers, households. It’s easy to listen to the older guys who approach them. They are vulnerable targets.

Certainly, there are many exceptions, Kareem, Magic, Dr. J, Mike, Jason Kidd, Kobe, Barkley, Bonds, and on and on. And consider that most of these names came from two parent families. They had involved father figures.

Nevertheless, somehow, the poor choices by the ‘other guys’ get the most exploitation and make it seem rampant among Black atheletes. And it is. Because they are the most vulnerable.

Illegal drug use and abuse by any athlete, including sterioids is idiotic. Common sense should win over. Your body is your key to success. You need your body in tip top shape to perform at your best. To perform at your best, you need your mind sharp. Drugs counter all of that.

It wears your organs down, it diminishes your aptitude, your quickness and speed, and distorts your judgment. And if you need sterioids to compete, maybe you’re in the wrong business. Specifically, African American athletes should realize they don’t need the added boost. They are just told they need them. Like race horses.

Critically, drug abuse increases your chances to lose not only your reputation and standing — your potential — but, if caught, no…when caught, you lose your freedom. A loss of freedom is equivalent to slavery. Didn’t we overcome that?

So, essentially, you become a slave to an intangible object, some inanimate thing that has no power to make you do anything, because drugs can’t speak, they can’t demand that you take them, they are not holding a gun to your head. It’s a pebble…a stone…a pet Rock that becomes a boulder, then a mountain that you are chained to.

Addiction is real, physically, but it’s also mental. An addict is married to his or her drug. The drug becomes your employer, your best friend, your child, your God.

There is not a little boy in the world who dreams about growing up and becoming a pro ball player, ever imagines they will become addicted to crack or meth and destroy that career. It’s not in their plans.

It’s a deception that found them before they saw it coming. And then it becomes a trap, sometimes a life long trap.

With all the speeches and anti-drug campaigns, nothing has penetrated the psyche of pop culture more than the glamorizing of drugs using icons. It was a bold move by the powers that be. It started with the tobacco industry.

Illegal drugs are a multi-trillion dollar tax-free business. It is the most profoundly enterprising pyramid network in the world. Nothing and NO ONE will ever be able to burst that bubble. It affords only the people at the very top of the pyramid to live a vast and luxurious lifestyle. And the “middle-men” get to live large for a very short amount of time and then the ride is over. They are expendable because most of them become their own clients.

Impressionable young minds will hear the lectures, and soak in the anti-drug ads, but most will follow the “trendy” thing to do. And talk is cheap.

The only way to reach future generations and to try and save the ones already affected, is for the successful men and women icons to launch major, major anti-drug campaigns…actually going into the schools and the communities and making more and more commercials and print ads. Market it like it’s hot to not do drugs.

Another antidote would be to find a way to persuade the media to stop covering celebrity mishaps when they involve drugs. If those incidents fail to receive exposure, eventually, young people will stop associating drugs with success. That doesn’t mean covering it up or hiding it.

It means acknowledging how detrimental those actions are and the cost. It could start with celebrities making statements about how much it costs to get out of those situations, and how difficult it would be for the average person to get back on their feet from the consequences of the legal ramifications.

Crime doesn’t pay, but you will. Using drugs is criminal behavior. The penalty is prison, a lost future, or a vicious cycle of a seamy, scary, and shameful lifestyle. Ain’t nothing glamorous about it. Drugs take the edge off only once, the first time. After that, it’s a trap. Drugs cannot make you escape your daily grind, they only create another cross to bear.

Abusing drugs can and will kill you eventually. Another penalty is poor health if you manage to survive. But the ultimate penalty is an early grave. And let’s face it, a grave at anytime is too early. Especially, if it could have been avoided.

Avoid the deception. Tell your “friends” to take it on down the road and sell it, cause you’re not buying. And feel good about that. If you’re already involved, be brave, get help, get clean, get free. Don’t be afraid to start over. Many, many people have done it.

Now that’s being cool. You’ve got four minutes to save the world.